More UK BABES

Found this site with tremendous SEC babes.

Coming Soon NFL Preview................................

For now here is some entertainment.  http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=N3eN0KwXcMU

Also notice the "Incredible Bulk" 

SEC

Preview

I apologize for my disappearance from Earth. As Barry Jole recently posted, a lot has gone on since the last time I checked in. My MLB Predictions look to be wretched, but who gives a shit. I'm a Reds fan so it has become customary to pack it up every summer around the All-Star Break. Since the last time I spoke with you squids, I have been Lushing quite heavily in the Holy City of Charleston. It has been awesome, and I am really enjoying my profession. I hope to have a long career with this firm, the people I work with are very talented. I have been working hard, so I can play hard, but more importantly lets discuss things that matter like SEC FOOTBALL!

I like the Cats chances of making a 4th straight bowl. There schedule is very favorable, with there toughest games at home. (Bama, Florida) As far as the SEC east goes, I like Florida hands down not only to defend there SEC crown(edging out LSU in the SEC Champ Game for the NC birth), but defending their National Championship. Georgia should contend, Tennessee will be much improved, Vandy looks to be scrappy, South Carolina will underachieve, and most importantly the Cats could suprise some people. My biggest concern is our mega chop quarterback, I have no faith in this guy and see nothing promising. We just need to run the hell out of the ball with our speedy 3 headed monster backfield, and let Randall Cobb touch the ball as much as possible. I wouldn't be suprised to see Morgan Newton the highly touted fresh quarterback from Indianapolis, taking over midway through the season. I would rather see a freshmen of his talent struggle and make mistakes, however a providing huge play making ability with his strong arm and running prowess. Opposing a hack such as Hartline throwing wounded ducks to Joker Philips on the sidline.

As for the West, my friend and co-worker who is a rabid Ole Miss Alum/Fan thinks the Rebels have what it takes to win the West, I like them too, but I'm not sure they can capture the Division. LSU is a legit NC Contender, and with Bama's formidable schedule, and Nick Saban's command, theres no reason they couldn't complete the regular season unscathed. The West's top 3 teams are much stronger than the East's. Arkansas will be scrappy and claw there way to a .500 season, Miss. State won't win an SEC game, and Auburn will be putrid, however nearly upsetting Bama in the Iron Bowl(and shockikng LSU). Here are my division predictions, I highlight the key wins and losses for each team. I plan on going to 4 or 5 Cats games, just gotta decide which ones. If you know SEC football, you know how excited I am for the season. There is simply nothing else like it, I get butterflys just thinking about it. I also look to take my tailgating to a new level, trying to upgrade from a College Lush style of tailgating, to a post grad frat daddy Lush style, with a little more coin in the pocket.

- STEVE DIXXX

SEC EAST:

1. Florida 11-1 Only loss at LSU

2. Kentucky 9-3 (wins over Lville, Auburn, Tenessee) (Losses to Bama, GA, Florida)

3. Georgia 8-4 (wins over Ok. St., SC, UK,) (Losses to LSU, FLA, UT, GA Tech)

4. Tenessee 7-5 (wins over UCLA, Auburn, SC) (Losses to FLA, GA, Bama, UK)

5. S. Carolina 4-8 (Wins over Vandy, Arkansas, FIU) (Losses to GA, FLA, BAMA, Clemson)

6. Vandy 4-8 (Wins over Miss. ST., Army, Western Car.) (Losses to UT, UGA, UK)

SEC WEST

1. Alabama 12-0 (wins over Va. Tech, Ole Miss, LSU, Auburn)

2. LSU 10-2 (wins over GA, FLA, Ole Miss) (losses to Bama, Auburn)

3. Ole Miss 10-2 (Wins over UT, Auburn, Arkansas) (loses to Bama, LSU)

4. Arkansas 6-6 ( Wins over Auburn, SC, Miss. St) ( loses to FLA, Texas A&M, Ole Miss, LSU)

5. Auburn 5-7 (Huge upset over LSU, almost pull it off over BAMA) (Loses Ole Miss, BAMA, WVU)

6. MSU 3-9 (chop wins over Jackson State, MTSU, Houston) (No SEC Wins, garbage)

WAAAASSAAAAAAPPPPP

Hey its Jole here.  I know it's been about a year since our last post, but Steve Dixxx and I are hoping to get back into the blogosphere so that we can keep all of our friends (read, just he and I) updated on our lives.  Aaaaand since I just finished up all 156 of the crossword puzzles in the book I bought last week, I thought tonight would be a great time.  But since it's Thursday about 9:30, that means Friends is on, so my non-heterosexual side may need to take some extra time during this post, so if it's a little "jabberwakie" (a word my mother uses with relative ease at least 4 times per conversation) no worries aaiiight?

So there's been a lot happening in the life of these two special guys since our last post.  The Masters was a pleasant affair, consisting of much drunkery, a 2 am fight with two rednecks trying to stick us with their cab fair, and a Hooters girl who just couldn't quite get the hint.  I almost vomited on Sunday while at The Masters due to the extreme amount of alcohol the night before and the 2 hours of sleep that was z'd up that night.  I think this whole account of that grand weekend may or may not have something to do with the fact that I'm unemployed at the moment.

Also, I heard we landed on the moon--- totally separate story.

On a side note, I've recently moved back to Richmond, VA.  It's good times living with some people finally and being back in the south, though there are many, many, many, many more rednecks down here than I recall.  Anyway, this was just an update post, look for more happenin' posts to be around soon.  

Babe City, USA

As I'm sure many of you remember, the Beach Boys had a hit single called "Surf City". Well, this post will not make another mention of that tune, but as you can see is similarly named. The title refers to a certain date with destiny that my friends and I have coming up this weekend.

I believe Jim Nantz may have coined the phrase "A tradition unlike any other", and that my friends will be lived by both myself and Steve Dixxx this weekend when we visit the place I have renamed "Babe City, USA"... Augusta, Georgia.

There will no doubt be plenty of babes to speak to and celebrities galore (we stood next to Will Ferrel last time we attended) not the least of whom is one Freddy Couples. Boom Boom, as those of us who pretend to know him personally call him, is a different sort of babe. The kind of babe that redefines the word itself and knocks the world off of its axis. Usually the word is left to describe only the most attractive of females, but Freddy is an iconic male babe who I will no doubt be following this weekend in his attempt to win a second Green Jacket. By the way, to Brez, that green jacket you wear around Randolph Macon's campus looks ridiculous and you should discontinue its use entirely then you should promptly go to the store and buy underwear so you actually have some to wear.

In the coming weeks, look for posts detailing each vulgar moment of our trip to Augusta. There will most assuredly be lushing, swearing, and gay jokes to tell.... be prepared.

Now that that is out of the way, I'd like to reminisce about my weekend past and let you in a little story that may well just gross you out.

I first must apologize for my lack of posting recently. I have been jibbed and gabbed by my friends (who actually don't even read this) about how I was letting my second blog fail. Rest assured that was not my intention. I've simply been caught up with trying to perfect my recent switch from a "modified tidal wave" hairstyle to the more business-esque and frat boy "combover". It's taken a lot of time and effort, but I think the transition is nearly complete.

Anyway back to the basics. Last weekend I went to Richmond to visit some buddies and take advantage of some underage high school chicks. The latter never came to fruition, but I like to think that's only because of the enormous faux pas I made mid-afternoon on Saturday.

As many of you know, I suffer from a very deadly and serious disease known as Celiac Disease. Basically I can't ingest gluten or my top and bottom end completely fall out. It's difficult to eat out because you'd really be surprised about all of the things that have gluten in them. Friday night, I decided to try the Vietnamese specialty "pho" because nothing really says "Hey, I'm all alone on Friday night", like reminders of the Vietkong and a 12 pack of Woodchuck Ciders.

So along came Saturday and my buddies decided to grill out. Having driven to Richmond early in the morning, I had neglected to eat anything and decided to go straight back to drinking. 12 "chucks" later and still on an empty stomach... I was hurting. That's when I realized that pho was made up of broth that clearly had gluten intertwined into the special techniques of its deliciousness.

To make a long story short, or atleast shorter than I could make it, I gambled with a fart and lost. Discouraged and inebriated, I ran to the downstairs bathroom where there, of course, was no toilet paper. I called out for help, but my cries were useless. No one would understand the inner workings of my stomach. My underpants already soiled, I decided that the only way out was to use them for clean up.

The nasty mess got worse after I had neatly disposed of the Undergarments Formerly known as Hanes. With no underpants and no real clean up happening, it was only a matter of time before my khaki shorts were ready to go the wayside. As we pulled into my other friends house to get ready for the evenings events, his gasp only confirmed what I already knew. My khakis were in fact, ruined.

Luckily, Nick had a shower and I had brought a change of clothes. Disaster averted... The evening unfolded farely sparse of events, other than when I drunkenly called my ex and casually told her, "I hope you're still doing really well as a slut and everything. You should kill yourself, talk to you later". No blood, no foul right???

WHERE THE HELL YA BEEN MR. DIXX ?

Hello Steve Dixx here back alive and well.  Sorry for the unexcused lengthy absence.  Well lets see where do I start?....    Tonight is the National Championship Game between the UNC Tarheels, and the Michigan State Spartans.  I really could give a shit about this game unfortunately, but I'd say I will be pulling for Michigan State.  The state of Michigan, and the city of Detroit need something to celebrate, and this run by Michigan State has given them a definite release from the economic recession.  I could see the Spartans playing inspired basketball tonight, and pulling off the upset, giving Tom Izzo his 2nd national championship.  With the disciplined, physical, hard nose style of play, and a lockdown defense, along with 60,000 fans you have to like there chance.  Clearly North Carolina is the more talented team, and are lead by there 4 time queen All- American  Tyler Hansbrough  who flops more than a fish out of water.  With an elite point guard in Ty Lawson, and the great in-game coaching by Roy Williams, they will be tough to beat.

Today is also one of the greatest days in Sports,  "Opening Day."  And its a special day for me because that always means its opening day for the oldest team in baseball, the Cincinnati Reds.  Once again they will be the host, with a day full of celebration in one of  America's truly great baseball cities.  This once proud and revered franchise has fallen on hard times after 8 straight losing seasons.  This could  very well be the year the Reds end this dreaded streak.  With a new approach, the Reds have been blessed with abundant young farm raised talent, that may be the most promising in the Major leagues.  They seem to be following the blue print of last years darling the 97 win American league champ Tampa Bay Rays.    With an emphasis on athletic players, lightning speed, solid defense, and an attempt to manufacture more runs.  After the departure of hogs Dunn, and Griffey,  there could be a positive change in culture.  Along with the emergence of young studs Joey Votto, Jay Bruce, Brandon Phillips, and Edison Volquez, most likely some of those players  will  become the leaders of a team searching for a definite identity.  I'm not saying the Reds will make the playoffs this year, but I think they will be much improved lead by one of the NL's deepest starting rotations.  I'm going to say they will at the worst be a .500 team, and at best an 88-90 win tim competing for the Wild Card spot.  A big factor will be luck.... Can they stay healthy?  Can Aaron Harang return to his once dominant form?  Can the Reds make up for the loss of Dunn's annual 40 home runs, 100 rbi's, 100 walks, and 100 runs????  We will have to see, but they will be an exciting team to watch.   

Here are my predictions for this years division by division Winner's and wild card.

N.L. Central               N.L. East                                     N.L. West

(Champ) Cubs 97-65 (Champ) Phillies 96-66     (Champ) Dodgers 88-74

2. Cardinals 90-72  2. Mets 94- 68 (Wild Card)    2. Giants 85- 77

3. Reds 87-75          3. Braves 86-76                    3. Diamondbacks 85-77

4. Brewers 85-77     4. Marlins 82-80                   4. Rockies 79 -83

5. Astros 73-89        5. Nationals 5-157                  5. Padres 66- 96

6. Pirates 1-161

A.L. East                                      A.L. Central                     A.L. West

(Champ) Yankees 101-61            (Champ) Indians 92-70 (Champ) Angels 95-67

2. Red Sox 98-64 (Wild Card) 2. Royals 87-75                   2. Rangers 87-75

3. Rays 90-72                              3. White Sox 84-78             3. Athletics 80-82

4. Jays 83-79                              4. Twins 82-80                 4. Mariners 74-88

5. Orioles 70-92                              5. Tigers 76-86

COMING SOON>>>>>>  Masters Preview, Also Predictions about the stories regarding my good friends and I experiencing a lushful weekend comparable to none other,  in Augusta Georgia.  The festivities will begin on Thursday night, when they arrive in Charleston.  Then on Saturday it's an early morning short drive to heaven on earth.

Steve Dixx's NCAA PIXX

Here's my pics for this years tourney. Barry Jole's will be up soon after he stops being depressed that Dayton got no love with an eleven seed. Just go to this link to view.

http://games.espn.go.com/tcmen/entry?entryID=532638

Gee Chuck, The Date Started Out Great, but Just Before We Got to The Party, She Seemed to Tense Up

I'll preface this post with this: A couple of my friends (Steve Dixx included) and I have an inside joke that occurred over my birthday weekend of last year. In the middle of a real conversation a slightly lushed out Steve asked to the crowd in a perfect southern accent, "You ever been wit' a man?". Needless to say, those of us around him were quite amused and the months since have been sprinkled with texts and phone calls first initiated with a "You ever been with a man" quote. I'll never say it again and I'll never laugh at it again.... EVER

I was having a tough time at work today as per usual, but then things really seemed to turn in my favor....

I am a sales rep for a brand new direct marketing company in the area. My objective each day is to stop in and introduce my product to as many local business owners as I can in the hopes of them paying me to have their advertisement on my piece. And when I say "my piece", I mean the multi-advertiser direct marketing piece, not my genitalia. Unfortunately, I think one gentleman I stopped in to talk to today got the wrong impression.

I was going about business as usual, getting turned down more than Steve Urkel, when I stopped in on one particular business and was received with open arms. After introducing myself to the manager and giving my very brief sales pitch, I was invited back to his desk which was in the back of this man's retail shop. We chatted, I asked him how business was, and he got into what makes his business special. The whole time alluding to the fact that my product was great and innovative... basically talking me up like he was a 7th grade girl who just got introduced to the most bodacious of the Jonas Brothers.

He eventually got so excited about my presence that he could no longer contain himself, I almost thought he was going to tear off his shirt and his 7 pieces of gold plated jewelry. Being a salesman, I walked to the rear of the store feigning interest in his ramblings about track lighting and its importance in a home. He then was interested in showing me just how each different bulb illuminated my hand against a wall, something I could hardly notice. However, I pretended to be blown away in true salesman form. That is of course until he insisted on showing me exactly where to place my hand.

As I held my hand up against the wall my man man leaned in and reached his up as well. Meanwhile, his opposite hand grazed my... ahem, uh... cough... uh.. you know what. One time thing, no big deal. He was older, shit like that happens I told myself.

Until it happened again.

This time he was showing me a different lighting. I looked down after it happened to notice he was holding a stack of Post-it (trademark) notes. THANK GOD I thought. I knew that couldn't be his hand grazing my man meat.

On we went examining the beauty of different forms of light streaming from above. Twice more the sticky notes bumped into me... "clumsy asshole" crossed my mind. Finally I got tired of it so I walked away and pretended to look at a different light where there was more room for us to maneuver without that damn paper touching my frank. Same routine of me putting my hand up against the light only this time I happened to peek down as I reached. NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO.

I caught a glimpse of backhand just as it came to rest up against my tally whacker. "I can't believe this... this dude is copping a feel on me," I said to myself. Being an unsuccessful salesman and seeing as he had shown interest in the advertising before stroking my cock, I tried to convince myself it wasn't happening, but it was. It happened once more and I called it quits. I told him I had a phone conference I had to take and bolted out of there like Benny "The Jet" Rodriguez had once shown me how.

As I tried to cope with what had just occurred I thought to call my father and see if it helped me move on in my life. It didn't. All he told me was to go have a stiff drink and a smoke. "I didn't just get laid by a Playboy bunny dad, I just had some creep try to jerk me off in a fucking lamp store."

Needless to say the rest of my day was shot and I'm pretty sure I won't ever be able to walk into a business again. I guess on the bright side there can never be any doubt in anyone's mind as to whether or not I'm gay-- otherwise I woulda taken him up on the offer.

On the other hand, he did offer to take me to lunch sometime as I walked out. Hmm.....

A Few Randon McNuggets

I was sitting around after work today pounding some ridiculously divine Peruvian chicken from a local slop house and I was pondering the following, "Man, I wonder why everything we eat has to have a dipping sauce?". I mean honestly think about it, is there much that we eat that doesn't have something we all know we can live without? Why is ranch dressing the epitome of every obese persons dream vegetable appetizer?

I mustn't confuse you with this ramble, I am certainly not the healthiest of eaters. In fact, I've had french fries twice in two days. Double in fact, I've fricken loved every bite of them. I'm just saying there is a point in time where you wonder if adding 100 calories to every bite of cucumber eaten needs to be slightly strapped down. Of all the vices in our world today, you'd think that grabbing the mayonnaise out of the "White, nasty shit that makes you fat" isle at Whole Foods would be one of the easier to fix. I could be wrong, but I bet my man Lebron James doesn't hire a personal nutritionist who allows him to load up on that stuff before a game.

Next point- similar subject- I always try to avoid white condiments as a general rule of thumb. Does anyone else get scared by these things? Now, many of you may say that is my homophobic side coming out (of the closet), but I assure you, I have no fear of the GLT community and little or no fear of things that remind me of my own semen. Shit just freaks me out, like how did they get it to be that color? That's not right. Even vanilla ice cream and frosting scares me. Ever seen a vanilla bean??? IT IS BLACK!!! WTF mate?

On a sadder note, I started a new job a couple of weeks ago... not as sweet as I thought. There's a part of me that thinks, "boy, if I had just convinced my dad I needed that extra year of college to grow into a successful adult", I could be drunk in a ditch somewhere right now. Wouldn't that be sweet? Seriously though, while I was looking for a job I was getting a little stir crazy just sitting around my apartment all day, but now that the weather is breaking I'm wondering if I should file for unemployment and test out my sea legs in Charleston with Steve. Honestly, I wasn't really living that badly while unemployed. I was still bringing in some bling bling from my old job and I got to play a lot of old XBox games. I even went to the Smithsonian Museum of American History and didn't eat fast food once. That's right, I avoided straying from my gluten free diet even though it woulda been sweet to pound a double cheeseburger and worth three days of the Screaming Meanies.

Anyway, that's all I got for right now. Plus, it's getting late and I'm sure Pornhub has been updated since last night. Until next time.....

NCAA Conference Tourney Picks

Hello this is Steve Dixx checking in. I am Barry's good friend from Dayton, Ohio. I just graduated from the University of Kentucky, and recently just moved down to beautiful Charleston, South Carolina. We both thought it would be a good idea to post about various topics such as sports, our personal golf games, and more importantly being a complete lush.(don't worry if you don't fully understand what a lush is, you soon will) Please understand that I have no English, or Journalism background, like Jole.(Im an Economics dude) His posts will be much more fluid, and well written, but I feel like I have some humorous and interesting input.

Here are my NCAA Conference Tourney Picks as well as Barry Jole's picks. We certainly are not as intelligent as analysts Jay Bilas, or Pat Forde, but we follow college basketball very closely, and feel that our picks are somewhat informed. While Jole's Dayton Flyer's are going to be dancing in the NCAA tourney, it looks as if my Cincy Bearcats, and Kentucky Wildcats, will be punching their tickets to the NIT.(Unless some miraculous runs in their respective tourneys, which is much more likely for U.K. because the SEC is not nearly as deep or talented as the Big East) By the way the last time both Cincinnati and Kentucky missed the NCAA field in the same year I was only 5 years old. (1990)

Also we are just picking the power conference winners, and the A10 for Jole's preference.

Barry Jole's Picks

ACC Champ: (UNC) Runner Up: (Duke) Dark Horse: (NC State)

Big 10 Champ: (MSU) Runner Up: (PSU) also picked as his dark horse.

Pac 10 Champ: (UCLA) Runner Up: (ASU) Dark Horse: (ASU)

SEC Champ : (Florida) Runner Up: (LSU) Dark Horse: (Auburn)

Big East Champ: (Louisville) Runner Up: (Pitt) Dark Horse: (NOVA)

Atlantic 10 Champ: (Xavier) Runner Up:(Dayton) Dark Horse: (St. Joe's)

Big 12 Champ: (Kansas) Runner Up: (Oklahoma) Dark Horse: (Ok. State)

Steve Dixx's Pixx

ACC Champ: (UNC) Runner Up: (Duke) Dark Horse: (FSU)

Big 10 Champ: (MSU) Runner Up: (Purdue) Dark Horse: (Penn St.)

Pac 10 Champ: (Washington) Runner Up: (Cal) Dark Horse: (Arizona)

SEC Champ: (LSU) Runner Up: (Tennessee) Dark Horse: (Auburn)

Big East Champ: (Louisville) Runner Up: (Pitt) Dark Horse: (Villanova)

Atlantic 10 Champ: (Xavier) Runner Up: (Dayton) Dark Horse: (Temple)

Big 12 Champ : (Oklahoma) Runner Up: (Kansas) Dark Horse: (Ok. State)

Fresh Start

I remember when I thought it would be cool to start a blog back in college (read, I could score with chicks) so I tried it out. I kept up with it for about two weeks, then shut it down because there was a chick who actually thought I was cool without even knowing about the blog. "A buddy o' mine" from high school has been very persistant about me returning to the glory of the blogosphere. I really think it's just because he is incredibly bored and wants to write on this himself.

My goal with the blog is to get some personal enjoyment, share some totally inside jokes with the four people that will read this, and to express some opinions when I feel it is necessary.

So to spare you from the cliche jargon of every failed college basketball player that thinks they are somehow as funny or as smart as Mark "The Shark" Titus, I won't be trying to impress you with links to the funniest youtube videos. I will, however, write some things that may be funny to you, or they might just be funny to me. I might write about the Yankees, or some sports team, I may just write about how TRUE the recent turn in the weather has me.

I may post regularly, I may not. My buddy wants me to put a lot of basketball picks on here, and while I'm not really sure who would care about my opinions, I'm certainly no Clark Kellogg. I'll probably allow him that much, if not for our own sanity I'm not sure what else. Plus, he seems to be on a serious run of picking winners (a subject I'll tackle in a humorous post very soon) so I'll most likely let him do most of the posting there.

In the near future look for stories involving our NCAA tourney picks, our trip to Augusta, Georgia for the Masters and much more. Oh, and expect to see some form of the word "lush" in just about every post.

Here's to one more try at this before I give up.....